I was so incredibly tired of waking up pissed off every single morning. Either someone was crying or asking me to heat up macaroni and cheese at 6 a.m. when I was still trying to open my eyes. I’d start the day off so angry. From there, we’d be in a constant state of rushing and whining and making insane compromises for the simplest task.

“Please go brush your teeth!” turned into “GO BRUSH YOUR TEETH RIGHT NOW! WE ARE GOING TO BE LATE!” at an astronomical volume. I’d send my daughter off to school as a stressed out, angry mom who mutters “Why does no one ever listen to me?!” under my breath. I’d then spend the rest of the day feeling immense guilt for reacting how I did.

I knew something needed to change when it came to our mornings, but I didn’t even know where to begin. So, I crowdsourced my mom friends. They all provided great ideas for how to make the mornings not a complete hot mess, but one suggestion stood out the best: make a visual routine.

We’ve always had routines in our house. There was an order of operations and a method to the madness, but somehow, there were still so many battles. So many power struggles. Getting my daughter to brush her hair or put socks on took twice as long as we needed it to in order to get out the door and to school on time. So, I tried out a visual routine.

I got creative and literally wrote down her entire morning routine with pictures and symbols (because we’re still in the early stages of reading!). I included everything from waking up and changing out of our PJs to putting on shoes and heading out the door.

When I presented the routine to her, she was delighted. But even better, she wanted to do these tasks that she used to put up such resistance for. She loved checking the boxes off. She loved to see what was coming next. My daughter is constantly asking me, “What are we doing today?”

Now, I can say, “Just go look at your routine board!”

More recently, I was fortunate enough to be gifted a routine board from Charmspring — the company behind the Springboard. It’s a magnetic board with customized tiles, much like the one I had made, but also a very nice step up. And like any routine board, it helps to encourage responsibility, independence, and executive functioning skills in kids — while also giving parents a good break.

The Springboard is perfect for our family. It’s the perfect size to fit all the customized tiles we needed to add in for our busy schedule and very aesthetically pleasing, so it’s not an eye sore in our kitchen. We hung the board at eye-level height so that my daughter could clearly see everything coming up for the week, plus add in her own choices for free time. (“Play outside” and “Scooter” seem to always end up on the board somehow! Funny how that keeps happening!)

The magnetic tiles are easy to mix and match and Charmspring sent along a couple of blank tiles for activities or tasks that might not be available to order on their website, like her Ninja class.

Parents can obviously go the DIY route, creating a routine board with just some paper and markers. And there are also some super cute (and more economical!) options on Etsy like this smaller board or this velcro option.

Research shows that kids thrive on routine. Knowing what their days look like provides safety and comfort, plus makes transitions from one activity to the next a lot easier.

According to Seattle Children’s Hospital, for young children, structure and routines help them gain self-confidence.

Plus, as I learned, families run more smoothly with a morning breakfast ritual, a getting-to-school routine, age-appropriate chores, shared family dinners and regular bedtimes. We had the right pieces, but we just needed to put them in place in a way that worked best for our family. Having something visual that my child could actually see and be a part of made all the difference.